It was pillow talk time and I couldn’t wait to tell my husband all the details of the day! It was late so I tried to prepare him that I had a lot to say, to which he kindly replied, “Well, pace yourself…Don’t feel like you have to tell it all in one sitting!” LOL!!!
As you know, there is a time for every husband-wife conversation under the sun….
Rule #1: There is a time to tell my husband the “cliff” notes and tell my girlfriends the details (i.e.: center pieces, who wore what, etc.).
Rule #2: There is a time when seeking his counsel to give specifics about the situation because it may change the advice he gives me and by failing to mention a few important details up front this can lead to major misunderstandings! (Oops!)
Rule #3: There is a time to go straight to the outcome of a situation and tell him everything is “okay” then back-track with the details. (i.e.: Dent in the car, speeding ticket, etc)
We are a family that talks it out! Our kids say we tend to over communicate (aka “beat a dead horse!”) but we’ve learned a few things about communication since March 13, 1982. I need to PACE myself with these questions:
Am I exercising PATIENCE? (Am I waiting my turn or do I often interrupt or jump to conclusions?)
Do I have a good ATTITUDE? (Do I listen well and show an interest in subjects he cares about? Am I attentive to details that matter to him?)
Is my response CHRIST-LIKE? (Am I kind when disagreeing? Do I take a biblical stand on issues in question respectfully?)
Am I an ENCOURAGER? (Do I give eye contact, use body language that says “keep talking” such as the occasional head nod or verbal “uh-huh’s” that say “I tracking with you.” And critically important: Am I checked out of technology and into the conversation?)
PACE yourself…. it will take more than one sitting, but the outcome is healthy pillow talk!